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Main => Gospel Music Lounge => Topic started by: T-Block on April 27, 2007, 02:45:29 PM
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Maybe this has been talked about before, but I don't feel like searching. This thread is about posting the worst pick-up lines. They can be lines that you have heard, lines that have be directed at you, or made up lines that you feel are just horibble. I'll start:
To a female: "Got milk?"
To a male: "U remind me of R. Kelly." T-Block is not gay, i'm just giving an example.
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I got one...
Male:Hey Ma let me get your Jersey?
Female: My what?
Male: Your Jersey...Your name and number
Just wack
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"he-ma-ma-ma-shanda----The Lord said, that that u and i have a future together......hey! GLORRRAAAAYYY"
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To a male: "U remind me of R. Kelly." T-Block is not gay, i'm just giving an example.
so the girl would be what, 15?
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Here's one along the lines of one I saw in a comic done by Charles M. Schulz, it was not a Peanuts comic, but another one.
"You know, I prayed to God last night to ask Him to make you say yes if I asked you out on a date, and well, here we are..."
My two cents.
It should work, after all, He won't deny me, right? lol.
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dude: Did it hurt?
Lady: Huh?
dude: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
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so the girl would be what, 15?
No, u missed the point. The point is that being reminded of R. Kelly is not a good line for a female to use on a male.
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- If I said you had a nice body, would you hold it against me?
- You must be exhausted...(pause)...because you've been running through my mind all day.
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Male: Girl you just like money...I just wanna hold you!
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No, u missed the point. The point is that being reminded of R. Kelly is not a good line for a female to use on a male.
Right, because the female would be accusing the guy of liking underage girls, which wouldn't be good. So, the girl must be about 15, like Wolfie said. :D
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Right, because the female would be accusing the guy of liking underage girls, which wouldn't be good. So, the girl must be about 15, like Wolfie said. :D
I guess u missed the point as well. The point is, a woman don't want to get wit no guy that likes underage girls like that.
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Male: Girl you just like money...I just wanna hold you!
Neva heard of that one before....but it sounds like something a dude would say!
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Male: Girl, I got my own ROOM...IN MY MAMA'S HOUSE. 8)
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Male: Girl, I got my own ROOM...IN MY MAMA'S HOUSE. 8)
LOL.....HAHAHAHA
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Male: Girl, I got my own ROOM...IN MY MAMA'S HOUSE. 8)
lol
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Male: Hey baby how you doin...
Female: Fine...
Male: I know but how you doin...
(well, it didn't seem corney 15 years ago...lol)
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Male: Hey baby how you doin...
Female: Fine...
Male: I know but how you doin...
(well, it didn't seem corney 15 years ago...lol)
I use a variation of this and it's STILL a good icebreaker. I always respond, "I know how you look, but how are you DOING?" I'm sincere with it, so I guess that's why it's taken at face value. ;)
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I use a variation of this and it's STILL a good icebreaker. I always respond, "I know how you look, but how are you DOING?" I'm sincere with it, so I guess that's why it's taken at face value. ;)
Now see you know some of these young bucs gonna take it and run with it.... ;)
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I use a variation of this and it's STILL a good icebreaker. I always respond, "I know how you look, but how are you DOING?" I'm sincere with it, so I guess that's why it's taken at face value. ;)
I don't think I EVER used pick-up line. I became the friend that they told EVERYTHING to then waited....
When I approached a female, it was usually after she knew me for a while, so I would just plainly ask for her phone number.
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Add on.
You need your feet rubbed because you been running through my mind all day.
Yo girl you banging.
If you dont marry me the Lord is going to get you.
I had a dream...lol
Thus saith the Lord of hosts...
You must have angels wings because I was praying for you hard last night.
Im taking you out tonight. Be ready at ??:??.
:D
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Now see you know some of these young bucs gonna take it and run with it.... ;)
And MOST will fail, bkecause they're going to try to put some ::) "original thought" in with it & I gurantee it's gonna bkegin with one of the following:
Yo
Yimean
Knumsayin'
I'm sayin' tho
Thus, it will end there. ;) :D
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I don't think I EVER used pick-up line. I became the friend that they told EVERYTHING to then waited....
When I approached a female, it was usually after she knew me for a while, so I would just plainly ask for her phone number.
Let me clarify, I never said I used it as a picc-up line. Just for convo purposes.
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I got one...
Male:Hey Ma let me get your Jersey?
Female: My what?
Male: Your Jersey...Your name and number
Just wack
That was funny.I never heard nobody say that one b4.
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Oooh girl...
I wish I could plant you and grow a whole FIELD of y'all
here's another:
Girl... you look so good I aughta put you on a plate and SOP YOU UP WIT A BISCUIT!!!
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I got one...
Male:Hey Ma let me get your Jersey?
Female: My what?
Male: Your Jersey...Your name and number
Just wack
You just mad, because it didnt' work for you...LOL
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Here is one fa sho:
YOU: Excuse me, would you like to <insert whatever activity> & get busy (christian site).
FEMALE: (gives you the ::) >:( -followed by "the beatbox"-after the latter option)
YOU: What? You don't like to <insert whatever activity>?
:D :D :D :D
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male: hey shortie
Female: hi
male: yo, you got some fries with that shake
_____________
second one
male: i know your feet hurt cause you been running through my mind all day
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male to female: excuse me
female: <looking puzzled>
male <looking down at her chest>: whatchall name is?
(I think this one is usable!)
male <to female musician>: do you know "oh when the saint's go marchin' in?"
female: yea
male: well can I get your number now? I don't feel like waitin' 'til later.
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LAWD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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(DEFINITELY USABLE!)
male <pokes female in the back>
female: excuse me?!
male: I'm sorry. I'm just checking to see if you had my other rib.
male <to "thick" female>: God told me I was going to be abundantly blessed....
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on the floor, MY SIDE IS HURTING
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MALE: WASSUP BABY, CAN I OFFER U A WORD OF ADVICE?
FEMALE: SURE
MALE: (TURNS AND BEGINS TO WALK AWAY) NEVER LET YOUR FUTURE WALK AWAY FROM YOU.
ARE YOU FROM TENNESSE CAUSE YOU THE ONLY TEN I SEE.
MISS CAN YOU HELP ME. I LOST MY PHONE NUMBER, CAN I HAVE YOURS?
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hahahahahahaha, LAWD!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Not usable:
male: Girl you so sweet, you're leaking kool-aid!
female <turning purple>
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funny !!!!!!!!!
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male to female: excuse me
female: <looking puzzled>
male <looking down at her chest>: whatchall name is?
I know of a female who named her "bosoms" tootie and fruity.
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I know of a female who named her "bosoms" tootie and fruity.
Well we ALL know what got the rest of the phrase!! ;) :D
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This ones too funny.
Guy walks up to gurl, sucks his finger and touches his shirt then hers.
Guy: What ya say we go and get outta these wet clothes?
:D :D
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I got another good one...
male <walks up to two women arguing>: ladies! if you're going to fight, fight over me!
...definitely usable.
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This ones too funny.
Guy walks up to gurl, sucks his finger and touches his shirt then hers.
Guy: What ya say we go and get outta these wet clothes?
:D :D
WOW, DAT WAS FUNNIE!! :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
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WOW, DAT WAS FUNNIE!! :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
That means it's usable then!
As long as they're laughing you're good to go.
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Now, let us all bow our heads and pray for the not-so-bright girls/ladies who will fall for this stuff and set us back a million years :D ;D ;)
SAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYTTTTTTTUUUUUUUUUNNNN, we bind your ever corny lines being used to trap God's purpose in the nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMM MMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEE of JEEEEEESSSUUUSSSSSSSSSSSS!
:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
(So what? I think I'm kinda comical - you don't?)
And, NO I DIDN'T fall for that mess! :D
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I despise when a female sends HER HOMEGIRL over to get at you for her. ::)
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My best friend and I were walking around in Toronto during Caribana. A guy starts walking backward in front of my friend's date, eventually dropping to his knees and saying (in a THICK Jamaican accent)
"Dear father God! I've been good this year. Please, please send me one like this angel for Christmas!"
If it weren't so funny, we'd have probably been of a mind to beat the brotha down for being so disrespectful.
Peace,
James
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Here's a dumb one.
Male: I wish I could re-arrange the alphabet.
Female: Why?
Male: So I could put U and I together!!!
No lie someone used it on me. Another thing that you shouldn't probably tell a girl before telling her you want to get with her is that you just came out of jail for a false domestic violence charge.....Not good.
Honest to God truth!!!!! :-\
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OK!! I think this one has got to be the worst pick up line in the WORLD!!!!!!
Disclaimer: I didn't make this up, I found it on Yahoo. Geeeezzz I don't want to tell it!!!!! Oh alright. I'll clean it up.
Girl, did you just (4 letter word rhymes with bart) cause you blow me away!
haa!!!!!!!!!! I can't believe I put that one up!! Sorry peeps. Couldn't resist!!
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Here's one to use at church:
Excuse me miss, can I lay hands on you?
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Sorrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!! I cleaned it up!!! It did say worst pick up line....I'm out. :-\
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Maybe this has been talked about before, but I don't feel like searching. This thread is about posting the worst pick-up lines. They can be lines that you have heard, lines that have be directed at you, or made up lines that you feel are just horibble. I'll start:
To a female: "Got milk?"
To a male: "U remind me of R. Kelly." T-Block is not gay, i'm just giving an example.
Remind me of R. Kelly!? What da ham sammich!? That would be an insult to me, because I'd reply back "so you're saying I look like a child molester who loves to let women do the #1 on him!?"
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Here's one to use at church:
Excuse me miss, can I lay hands on you?
::) Geezzz what a ditz I am!!! I thought you were bukin me! HAA!!!! I didn't see that you wrote "Here's one to use at church". wheeeewwwww!!!! Well I repented anyway!!!
;D
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Remind me of R. Kelly!? What da ham sammich!? That would be an insult to me, because I'd reply back "so you're saying I look like a child molester who loves to let women do the #1 on him!?"
EXACTLY!!!
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I don't think I EVER used pick-up line. I became the friend that they told EVERYTHING to then waited....
When I approached a female, it was usually after she knew me for a while, so I would just plainly ask for her phone number.
thought I was the only one.
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(DEFINITELY USABLE!)
male <pokes female in the back>
female: excuse me?!
male: I'm sorry. I'm just checking to see if you had my other rib.
male <to "thick" female>: God told me I was going to be abundantly blessed....
I like these. I like full figured women too. ;D ::)
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Full figured women can catch a fish without a hook!
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Full figured women can catch a fish without a hook!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
gooney goo-goo...........
hahahahahahahahahahahaha
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Full figured women can catch a fish without a hook!
OH HECK TO THE NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! >:(
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Full figured women can catch a fish without a hook!
I caught you didn't I...LOL! Really I just wanted to call you a fish...thanks!
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A fisher who can catch a fish without a hook must be extremely talented and skilled. Dumb pick-up line for a man to say but in a sense it's a compliment.
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CAN I PAY YOUR BUS FARE? I swear I will never set foot on a subway again.
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Greetings madam, would it be possible that you would be interested in accompanying me on a night of entertaining social activities?
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here's one:
Guy: hey ma how you doin'?
Girl: fine..
Guy: I know you fine, but how you doin'?
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Hi, i'm a studying to be a gynocologist, may I practice on you?
Ummm, excuse me miss, one of your boobs seems to be out of place, may I fix it for you?
If size doesn't matter, I'm the right guy for you baby.
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Yo clothes look a bit tight baby.... Why don'tcha do like Vicki Winans and shake yo'self loose!!!!
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Shake yourself loose? Gotta use that!
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This was used on my recently after having dinner with a young man. We are standing outside his car, all is going well...then he heads downhill with the following.
Him: "So yeah, you like my truck?"
Me: "Oh yeah it is niiiice. I like the color."
Him: "Oh really...you see it has tinted windows."
Me: "Yeah..."
Him: "Well, you know people can't really see in."
Me: <thinking to myself..."DUH">
Him: "Would you like a tour?" AND THIS DUDE PROCEEDED TO GIVE ME A TOUR OF HIS CAR...to get me in the back of his truck! I TELL YA!
I fell out laughing and was like..."Do you want a tour of my fist?"
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"Are you a parking ticket? Cause you got FINE written all over you..."
These were the words said to me as I stepped off the El in Philly on Saturday. SMH...
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I know this thread is old but here I go:
girl:' so what's your name?'
guy: ' well my friends call me[insert name] but you can call me anytime!'
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"Are you a parking ticket? Cause you got FINE written all over you..."
These were the words said to me as I stepped off the El in Philly on Saturday. SMH...
Did it work? :D
You could pull a 'color purple' and say "girl i'll drink yo bath water..." :P :D
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This isn't a 'pick- up' line but I can't stand when guys say, "what's up sexy". That is soo irritating! ::)
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guy: I have 9 digits in my head but what order do they need to be in to call you..
::) ::) ::)
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WOW, for some reason I don't even remember starting this thread. I wonder what was I thinking?
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WOW, for some reason I don't even remember starting this thread. I wonder what was I thinking?
::)
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Dude: "Don't you owe me dinner?"
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Dude: You look just like my mom you should come over for dinner.
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Worst Pick-up line: ANY pick-up line.
Many women are smart enough to realize you're using a line and, even if they talk to you, you've already made a bad first impression.
Just be yourself.
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Dude: Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes?
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This was used on my recently after having dinner with a young man. We are standing outside his car, all is going well...then he heads downhill with the following.
Him: "So yeah, you like my truck?"
Me: "Oh yeah it is niiiice. I like the color."
Him: "Oh really...you see it has tinted windows."
Me: "Yeah..."
Him: "Well, you know people can't really see in."
Me: <thinking to myself..."DUH">
Him: "Would you like a tour?" AND THIS DUDE PROCEEDED TO GIVE ME A TOUR OF HIS CAR...to get me in the back of his truck! I TELL YA!
I fell out laughing and was like..."Do you want a tour of my fist?"
o snap, that was you?
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I've heard my friend use this....smh
Dude: I'm the best looking guy in here and you're in the top 5....why don't we make sumthin happen.
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I was drinking a slurpee yesterday and this dude says:
"Thats one lucky straw..."
I'd tell you what I said back, but this is a family site.... and I'll leave it at that.
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I use to work as a manager at a Lowe's store and I actually heard one of the employees say thins and I died laughing right in the middle of the store. These two ladies walk into the store, a mom (40s but still looking good) and her daughter (college age). So, the employee who is 22 is staring in their direction and gets caught. The girl says hi to him and tries to actually flirt with him. What he say next has stayed with me ever sense. She say and I quote, "Girl, you fine and all but I was really wantin to holla at yo momma . . . I ain't sayin you ugly or nothin . . . . . but, d@mn . . . . . . YO MOMMA!!!"
I have NEVER laughed soooooo hard in my LIFE!!!
I gonna have to pull a Tip . . . . . WHO DOES THAT?!?!?!
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I was drinking a slurpee yesterday and this dude says:
"Thats one lucky straw..."
I'd tell you what I said back, but this is a family site.... and I'll leave it at that.
:o
Thou jivest...
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Worst Pick-up line: ANY pick-up line.
Many women are smart enough to realize you're using a line and, even if they talk to you, you've already made a bad first impression.
Just be yourself.
I don't really agree with that. Some lines are funny, and even though it's obvious that it's just a "line" if it makes me laugh, you've broken the ice and shown me that you have a good (or decent) sense of humor. Now obviously, if it makes me roll my eyes or frown up my face, you've made a bad impression. But I've heard some really funny ones that made me genuinely smile even if I wasn't really interested - and to me, that's not a bad thing. :)
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On subject... over the weekend, I went to a Burger King and this very handsome, but very old guy (probably in his late 60s or so) said to me, "what are you, like 20?" With this thread in mind, I laughed and said, "are you serious? That's the best you could come up with?" And we both laughed.
Then when I got ready to leave, he said, "for real, little lady, how old are you 22? 25? I like 'em young!"
I laughed because he was old and SO lame... but that really grossed me out. :D :D :D :D
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I was drinking a slurpee yesterday and this dude says:
"Thats one lucky straw..."
I'd tell you what I said back, but this is a family site.... and I'll leave it at that.
:D
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Worst Pick-up line: ANY pick-up line.
Many women are smart enough to realize you're using a line and, even if they talk to you, you've already made a bad first impression.
Just be yourself.
I don't really agree with that. Some lines are funny, and even though it's obvious that it's just a "line" if it makes me laugh, you've broken the ice and shown me that you have a good (or decent) sense of humor. Now obviously, if it makes me roll my eyes or frown up my face, you've made a bad impression. But I've heard some really funny ones that made me genuinely smile even if I wasn't really interested - and to me, that's not a bad thing. :)
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On subject... over the weekend, I went to a Burger King and this very handsome, but very old guy (probably in his late 60s or so) said to me, "what are you, like 20?" With this thread in mind, I laughed and said, "are you serious? That's the best you could come up with?" And we both laughed.
Then when I got ready to leave, he said, "for real, little lady, how old are you 22? 25? I like 'em young!"
I laughed because he was old and SO lame... but that really grossed me out. :D :D :D :D
I don't think you really disagree. It's the curse of LGM semantics. :D
I was drinking a slurpee yesterday and this dude says:
"Thats one lucky straw..."
I'd tell you what I said back, but this is a family site.... and I'll leave it at that.
Wow. What a moron.
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I don't think you really disagree. It's the curse of LGM semantics. :D
Nah, I do disagree. :D
What I'm saying is that I'm smart enough to realize it's a line, but it doesn't make a bad first impression (unless it's rude or ignorant - like saying the straw is lucky).
For example, this quote below is clearly a line, and I'm one of the "many women" who "are smart enough to realize" he's "using a line." But it would make me smile and would not leave a bad first impression at all. On the contrary, I'd probably laugh and allow him to engage me in conversation.
Dude: "Don't you owe me dinner?"
The part I'm responding to is the part about it leaving a bad first impression and that any pick up line is bad. I just don't agree with that. If that's okay with you... lol.
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Nah, I do disagree. :D
What I'm saying is that I'm smart enough to realize it's a line, but it doesn't make a bad first impression (unless it's rude or ignorant - like saying the straw is lucky).
For example, this quote below is clearly a line, and I'm one of the "many women" who "are smart enough to realize" he's "using a line." But it would make me smile and would not leave a bad first impression at all. On the contrary, I'd probably laugh and allow him to engage me in conversation.
The part I'm responding to is the part about it leaving a bad first impression and that any pick up line is bad. I just don't agree with that. If that's okay with you... lol.
k
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OK I think I gat one:
Guy in a mall stumbles in front of a girl he been watching.......
He appears to be mute, and can't breathe, rolling his eyes, gasping desperately for air, other women touched him but he stayed in that state untill that one girl touches him and immediately he is restored and he says to her...
"See...I knew that you were..."
after he said that, the girl takes his hand off of him and he went into his gasp again, then when she touches him he revives and finishes...with....
"you are the air I breath. Without you I would die, this means you have to stay with me forever."
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OK I think I gat one:
Guy in a mall stumbles in front of a girl he been watching.......
He appears to be mute, and can't breathe, rolling his eyes, gasping desperately for air, other women touched him but he stayed in that state untill that one girl touches him and immediately he is restored and he says to her...
"See...I knew that you were..."
after he said that, the girl takes his hand off of him and he went into his gasp again, then when she touches him he revives and finishes...with....
"you are the air I breath. Without you I would die, this means you have to stay with me forever." Then he brokes into singing "No Air" By Jordan Sparks and Chris Brown, then he tops it by singing "Taking all of my energy"
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OK I think I gat one:
Guy in a mall stumbles in front of a girl he been watching.......
He appears to be mute, and can't breathe, rolling his eyes, gasping desperately for air, other women touched him but he stayed in that state untill that one girl touches him and immediately he is restored and he says to her...
"See...I knew that you were..."
after he said that, the girl takes his hand off of him and he went into his gasp again, then when she touches him he revives and finishes...with....
"you are the air I breath. Without you I would die, this means you have to stay with me forever."
That's no pick-up line! With all of that work and acting, that's more like a pick-up routine! :D
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A very dumb routine...
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Now THAT would leave a bad first impression... no doubt.
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OK I think I gat one:
Guy in a mall stumbles in front of a girl he been watching.......
He appears to be mute, and can't breathe, rolling his eyes, gasping desperately for air, other women touched him but he stayed in that state untill that one girl touches him and immediately he is restored and he says to her...
"See...I knew that you were..."
after he said that, the girl takes his hand off of him and he went into his gasp again, then when she touches him he revives and finishes...with....
"you are the air I breath. Without you I would die, this means you have to stay with me forever."
***Insert dude shaking head No****
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Hey Mother Jenkins, let me holla atcha fo' a minute!
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I dunno... I kinda like the "Do fries go wit dat shake?" LOL, It does something for me... LOL. :D
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I dunno... I kinda like the "Do fries go wit dat shake?" LOL, It does something for me... LOL. :D
duly noted... ;) :D
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I dunno... I kinda like the "Do fries go wit dat shake?" LOL, It does something for me... LOL. :D
Uhhh... it did something for me back in the early 80s... lol.
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Uhhh... it did something for me back in the early 80s... lol.
I thought you was 27 ?/? :D ;D
In the early 80's I was a baby... LOL.
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Im watching Boyz N Da Hood, and Ice Cube said "Lemme knock the stuffin off dat egg McMuffin..." :D I have no clue what that means.
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Come on now even I know what that means! Lol. Surely you must be joking! Lol.
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Come on now even I know what that means! Lol. Surely you must be joking! Lol.
No I dont really. LOL L7 for real.
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Girl, I'm gonna cross my eyes when I look at you so I can see two of y'all!!
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Haa thats hilarious!
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Girl, I'm gonna cross my eyes when I look at you so I can see two of y'all!!
Nice!!!
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so) said to me, "what are you, like 20?" With this thread in mind, I laughed and said, "are you serious? That's the best you could come up with?"
Uhhh... it did something for me back in the early 80s... lol.
COVER. BLOWN. NO MORE 23 JUMPSTREET ASSIGNMENTS FOR YOU.
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I heard this lady telling a story about an encounter she had with a Chinese midget...
Midget: Do you have a little Asian in you
Lady: NO
Midget: Do you want one?
:o :o :o
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I heard this lady telling a story about an encounter she had with a Chinese midget...
Midget: Do you have a little Asian in you
Lady: NO
Midget: Do you want one?
:o :o :o
Is this "lady" you? ;D
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Is this "lady" you? ;D
Trust me... no one has enough money to post the bond it would have taken to get me outta jail if someone said this mess to me... LOL.
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Trust me... no one has enough money to post the bond it would have taken to get me outta jail if someone said this mess to me... LOL.
Pwa! :D