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Author Topic: Got a dilemma....would like suggestions  (Read 8567 times)

Offline shall176

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Got a dilemma....would like suggestions
« on: April 21, 2008, 07:36:54 AM »
Hey guys....here is the deal.  I play drums at the church....unpaid.  I have missed the last three choir rehearsals....with permission......due to having a three week stint playing a gig at a restaurant.  The restaurant has decided that they would like to pick us up weekely, for the same night in which we have choir/praise team rehearsal.  Now I have a decision....play the gig, and make $100+ a week, and not play at church (policy is no rehearsal, no play), or give up the gig to another guy and remain the church drummer.  Since the church does not pay me, and I need the cash with gas prices and day care costs the way they are, I am inclined to do that.  But I want to help the church, and I don't want to give up the spot.  Now, we do have band rehearsal on Saturday's, but still...I need to be at choir /praise team rehearsal to play.  What do you guys think.

Also I fear this.  I go on the gig, cuz I need the money, cuz the church does not pay me...then they go and HIRE someone to replace me.  I think that is a definite posibility, however stupid it may sound.  Just seems at time the church will pay for mediocrity outside, rather than take care of their own inside (and my opinion of myself is not mediocrity).....not saying my church will, but I have seen it many many times elsewhere, and just hope it does not happen in mine.
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Offline under13

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Re: Got a dilemma....would like suggestions
« Reply #1 on: April 21, 2008, 07:49:26 AM »
This is your home church? Why is it that home churches always do us dirty?

If I were you I'd try again to get that $100 a week from the church. How big is the church? They are probaly just being cheap. I'd also tr to find some other gig on another night that wont interfere with church. It all comes down to your priorities. What is more important to you? $100 or playing at church.

Offline sjonathan02

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Re: Got a dilemma....would like suggestions
« Reply #2 on: April 21, 2008, 08:12:42 AM »
a. What did God say to you about this?

b. Go to the church and tell them what you've told us; they don't seem to care and/or aren't going to change how they deal with you, then you must provide for your family.

c. What do you want to do?
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Offline stiksnmypocket

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Re: Got a dilemma....would like suggestions
« Reply #3 on: April 21, 2008, 08:29:43 AM »
waht up bro? hey I really think this is a test bro, I'm not gonna preach to you or attempt to but stay faithful and true to yourself and you will come out the Victor, trust me its worth it,

p.s. Pass the test wit flying colors and your reward will be waaay greater than an extra $100 a wk ;D ;D ;D
Do what you do, but do it well!!!

Offline stiksnmypocket

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Re: Got a dilemma....would like suggestions
« Reply #4 on: April 21, 2008, 08:31:16 AM »
and when I said faithful I meant to God and not to a "building" or "human being".....
Do what you do, but do it well!!!

Offline under13

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Re: Got a dilemma....would like suggestions
« Reply #5 on: April 21, 2008, 08:35:09 AM »
waht up bro? hey I really think this is a test bro, I'm not gonna preach to you or attempt to but stay faithful and true to yourself and you will come out the Victor, trust me its worth it,

p.s. Pass the test wit flying colors and your reward will be waaay greater than an extra $100 a wk ;D ;D ;D

+1.

Offline JFunky

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Re: Got a dilemma....would like suggestions
« Reply #6 on: April 21, 2008, 09:25:22 AM »
waht up bro? hey I really think this is a test bro, I'm not gonna preach to you or attempt to but stay faithful and true to yourself and you will come out the Victor, trust me its worth it,

p.s. Pass the test wit flying colors and your reward will be waaay greater than an extra $100 a wk ;D ;D ;D

...end thread. 8)
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Offline sugabear

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Re: Got a dilemma....would like suggestions
« Reply #7 on: April 21, 2008, 09:27:34 AM »
A lot of times what I've found out is that a lot of church musicians have not because the ask not. Before you make any major move such as this pray and see what God says, then speak to the necessary person at church to see how they feel about paying you. You would have to be very careful how you handle that conversation though. If they feel like they're being approached the wrong way or forced you won't get any results. For that reason, I wouldn't mention the other gig situation. At the very least, you can get an idea how of they feel about paying you and partly base your decision on that factor.
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Offline Cherri

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Re: Got a dilemma....would like suggestions
« Reply #8 on: April 21, 2008, 10:38:14 AM »
A lot of times what I've found out is that a lot of church musicians have not because the ask not. Before you make any major move such as this pray and see what God says, then speak to the necessary person at church to see how they feel about paying you. You would have to be very careful how you handle that conversation though. If they feel like they're being approached the wrong way or forced you won't get any results. For that reason, I wouldn't mention the other gig situation. At the very least, you can get an idea how of they feel about paying you and partly base your decision on that factor.

Especially... The subject avenue of money.
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Offline blesedone1

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Re: Got a dilemma....would like suggestions
« Reply #9 on: April 21, 2008, 11:41:05 AM »
waht up bro? hey I really think this is a test bro, I'm not gonna preach to you or attempt to but stay faithful and true to yourself and you will come out the Victor, trust me its worth it,

p.s. Pass the test wit flying colors and your reward will be waaay greater than an extra $100 a wk ;D ;D ;D
yeah...i believe you already know the answer within yourself.

Offline QCdrummer

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Re: Got a dilemma....would like suggestions
« Reply #10 on: April 21, 2008, 11:54:48 AM »
If it were me, I would be highly upset, going to my home church and having to watch somebody else play songs I know I would straight kill. And having to watch it every Sunday would hurt me. But I would say sit out for the time being, and when the restaurant thing is over see about getting back in the church rotation.
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Offline stiksnmypocket

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Re: Got a dilemma....would like suggestions
« Reply #11 on: April 21, 2008, 12:39:06 PM »
If it were me, I would be highly upset, going to my home church and having to watch somebody else play songs I know I would straight kill. And having to watch it every Sunday would hurt me. But I would say sit out for the time being, and when the restaurant thing is over see about getting back in the church rotation.

Yea what he said, put Gods work on hold to play at some restaurant for some chump change, that sounds like great advice... ?/? ?/? ?/? ?/?

"Red" sounds like flesh to me doc, at any rate if the spirit is there you wouldn't let the lousiest drummer hinder your worship or praise... or is it about "Killing" songs now, IDK, trust me I know it would suck but I wouldn't be upset or hurt, more so at the decision I made to bounce in the 1st place to let somebody take my sit, but Ill be quiet cuz I'm known for having locked threads....lol
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Offline SabianKnight

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Re: Got a dilemma....would like suggestions
« Reply #12 on: April 21, 2008, 01:49:49 PM »
Pray and directly ask God if He gave you the Restaurant gig.

Approach the decision making hiearchy at your church. Explain the financial situation and the opportunity. You faithfulness to the church and your daily walk will speak for itself. If they are paying any musician they should be paying all the musicians to at least show their appreciation for the gift God has provided in you and the others. If they consider and understand the place of the minstrel/musicians in the Levitical order then they should be providing for that. Giving to a visiting minister/music minister is considered protocol but the same type protocol should stand for  the servants of the house. God put people in place to administer to His will but all to often in regards to this subject man does what man thinks he should do/man thinks is right. No work/labor should go unrewarded.

You traveling to the Drum Collective to study on your own, establishing a music and clinic program for kids/aspiring musicians - bring in high profile Christian artist to inspire/teach speaks volumes. What will be revealed is the value that your local church home places in you and stewardship and Christian mentorship.

If they pay someone to come in and take you place then that tells you something. Don't get bitter, simply continue to be a music minister and work as unto the LORD to create you own opportunities. Find your true covering to mentor and support that endeavor. For EVERYTHING there is a season. Could be that your season there or at least in that music dept or ministry is up.
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Offline shell06

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Re: Got a dilemma....would like suggestions
« Reply #13 on: April 21, 2008, 02:03:32 PM »
Hey guys....here is the deal.  I play drums at the church....unpaid.  I have missed the last three choir rehearsals....with permission......due to having a three week stint playing a gig at a restaurant.  The restaurant has decided that they would like to pick us up weekely, for the same night in which we have choir/praise team rehearsal.  Now I have a decision....play the gig, and make $100+ a week, and not play at church (policy is no rehearsal, no play), or give up the gig to another guy and remain the church drummer.  Since the church does not pay me, and I need the cash with gas prices and day care costs the way they are, I am inclined to do that.  But I want to help the church, and I don't want to give up the spot.  Now, we do have band rehearsal on Saturday's, but still...I need to be at choir /praise team rehearsal to play.  What do you guys think.

Also I fear this.  I go on the gig, cuz I need the money, cuz the church does not pay me...then they go and HIRE someone to replace me.  I think that is a definite posibility, however stupid it may sound.  Just seems at time the church will pay for mediocrity outside, rather than take care of their own inside (and my opinion of myself is not mediocrity).....not saying my church will, but I have seen it many many times elsewhere, and just hope it does not happen in mine.

Oh no it's not stupid, it's actually the God honest truth (shame isn't it?) Thats how many churches roll nowadays, simply taking advantage of their own because they know you will play regardless.... >:( I've had to deal with this until recently so I know) Best thing I can say is PRAY and meditate. The Lord will lead you to what He wants you to do. Just make sure you open up your ears and be willing to listen. :) God bless

Offline shell06

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Re: Got a dilemma....would like suggestions
« Reply #14 on: April 21, 2008, 02:08:00 PM »





Hey guys....here is the deal.  I play drums at the church....unpaid.  I have missed the last three choir rehearsals....with permission......due to having a three week stint playing a gig at a restaurant.  The restaurant has decided that they would like to pick us up weekely, for the same night in which we have choir/praise team rehearsal.  Now I have a decision....play the gig, and make $100+ a week, and not play at church (policy is no rehearsal, no play), or give up the gig to another guy and remain the church drummer.  Since the church does not pay me, and I need the cash with gas prices and day care costs the way they are, I am inclined to do that.  But I want to help the church, and I don't want to give up the spot.  Now, we do have band rehearsal on Saturday's, but still...I need to be at choir /praise team rehearsal to play.  What do you guys think.

Also I fear this.  I go on the gig, cuz I need the money, cuz the church does not pay me...then they go and HIRE someone to replace me.  I think that is a definite posibility, however stupid it may sound.  Just seems at time the church will pay for mediocrity outside, rather than take care of their own inside (and my opinion of myself is not mediocrity).....not saying my church will, but I have seen it many many times elsewhere, and just hope it does not happen in mine.

Sorry highlighted the wrong part... ;D

Oh no it's not stupid, it's actually the God honest truth (shame isn't it?) Thats how many churches roll nowadays, simply taking advantage of their own because they know you will play regardless....  I've had to deal with this until recently so I know) Best thing I can say is PRAY and meditate. The Lord will lead you to what He wants you to do. Just make sure you open up your ears and be willing to listen.  God bless

Offline shall176

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Re: Got a dilemma....would like suggestions
« Reply #15 on: April 21, 2008, 02:42:23 PM »
Thanks for the responses guys.  If I didn't love my church so much and care about the quality of the music, and the ministry, and was out to chase the money, it would not have been so hard to make a decision.  Someone told me today that the fact that I play for free, and deal with the frustrations, etc, and still struggle with this says a lot about my commitment.  At the same time, the extra $ would come in handy.  I will continue to pray and will fast on this.  The negotiations are not complete so I have a bit of time and eventually this will probably fix itself.  I will also approach the decision makers in the church as suggested.  I have already spoken with the band leader who offered no help, cuz seems to me, he thinks its a no brainer.  take the money.  The church like many others is going through financal pains, so I don't want to appear to give an ultematum.  But from reading ou guys responses....I really feel it will all work itself out.  Thanks guys.  I appreciate it.

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Offline dude-on-drums

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Re: Got a dilemma....would like suggestions
« Reply #16 on: April 21, 2008, 03:45:11 PM »
Simply explain to your church that youre taking another job and you wont be available to play there.  You dont have to tell them what it is youre doing or where youre going.  Tell them youre just doing it cause you need the money.  Its the truth.  Then they will say either "good luck" or "how can we help?"  Then you go from there. 

I'm tellin you guys this.  If you can afford to play for free and thats what you want to do, then do it.  But if you cant, then dont.  Simple.  Dont get caught up in the "but this is my church home" mentality.  Your church home will always be your church home.  That has nothing to do with what you do for them and what they do or dont do for you.  Work first.  Church second.

And another thing.  The longer you guys play for free, the harder it will be for someone to actually pay you good money because youre not building any value in your works.  When you go from one job to the next, they always want to know how much your last job paid.  If you have to tell them you worked for free, where do you think your pay will start out?  It could start out at $25 a week cause thats a heck of alot more than what you were getting before.

On another subject, Im sick of everyone sharing this dream that one day their pastor is gonna have 10,000 members and as a musician, you wont have to work anymore!  Thats so weak!  The church is not a crutch for lazy musicians!  And stop letting your church talk you in to something like that.  They will have you missing all kinds of oportunities because of their selfishness.  Follow your own heart.  Dont let anyone sway you from making moves that are logical and financially smart.  Take God with you...He's not just at church every sunday.  If He's in you, then He's everywhere you are.  Make moves my people.   :)

Offline under13

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Re: Got a dilemma....would like suggestions
« Reply #17 on: April 21, 2008, 03:47:41 PM »
Simply explain to your church that youre taking another job and you wont be available to play there.  You dont have to tell them what it is youre doing or where youre going.  Tell them youre just doing it cause you need the money.  Its the truth.  Then they will say either "good luck" or "how can we help?"  Then you go from there. 

 

WoW. I dare you to post that in the lounge

Offline fretai03

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Re: Got a dilemma....would like suggestions
« Reply #18 on: April 21, 2008, 04:52:19 PM »
WoW. I dare you to post that in the lounge

Pfft... What makes you think we don't post like this in the lounge? ::)

Offline under13

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Re: Got a dilemma....would like suggestions
« Reply #19 on: April 21, 2008, 05:36:36 PM »
Pfft... What makes you think we don't post like this in the lounge? ::)

Cuz they will throw verses at you about submitting to the church so fast, it'll make your head spin.
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