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Offline 3rd-Day

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Re: Studio Recording ?'s
« Reply #80 on: June 14, 2008, 08:15:41 AM »
First giving honor to God and the pastor of this house, 4hisglory.  The deacons of this room, Juse and Sabe.  And to all the drumming saints who are blessed with eyes to read this thread.  ***I would insert a grin smiley but I'm on my PDA and I don't have that option lol*** 

This is indeed a grown man thread.  Strictly for the big boys.  So since I have a big boy audience, I decided not to start another thread by asking my question here.  I'm asking the deacons to bare with me as I stray from the subject of this thread but inquire about an issue that has stemed from previous statements here.

BBD you have stated that you have a family.  I know that a few of us do.  To this day, I still havnt brought myself to the point where I can leave my daughter to hustle on the road as a musician.  I have responsibilities that I must maintain for me and my child such as health insurance, dental insurance, retirement, child support, parent and teacher conferences and so on.  For those of you on the road with families, how do you balance.  This is a little personal but I actually lost my marriage to the game and it was on a local level.  I can't imagine how much faster I wouldve lost it if I was on a national level. 

I mean I went to a drum clinic to see steve ferone, steve smith, don f., and mike manginni, and these guys were talking about how they have lost their families as well to their craft.  I look on myspace and I see spanky missing his daughter's birthday and I'm sympathising like man our daughters are around the same age.  I don't know how I would deal with that.  I know calvin has a son, flat and beatboxer have kids.

If there is anyone out there who wouldn't mind sharing how to balance, (if there's such a thing) please do.  I'm sure everyone has different ways of handling business.  I'm just trying to see what's really good since no one really ever talks about it.



Respectfully,
Sheen

Now this is real talk and its just in time for Fathers Day. Lets get into some grown folk talking. What an excellent and very important question.   All of those things in bold are very important.  Teachers and Parents conferences are very important especially for Fathers. Seeing Mommy show up is one thing, but when the Staff and Principles know who Daddy is because he can show up just as easy as Mom can and sometimes unannounced, now thats Huge.

Imma be chillin somewhere over here awaiting the wisdom------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------>   

By the way Happy Fathers Day to all the Fathers reading this! 

D.O.D. excellent execution!  Definetly worthy of a grammy nomination for Best LGM Thread High Jack.
Im too tall to act small.

Offline Da_Drumma

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Re: Studio Recording ?'s
« Reply #81 on: June 14, 2008, 08:37:53 AM »
First giving honor to God and the pastor of this house, 4hisglory.  The deacons of this room, Juse and Sabe.  And to all the drumming saints who are blessed with eyes to read this thread.  ***I would insert a grin smiley but I'm on my PDA and I don't have that option lol*** 

This is indeed a grown man thread.  Strictly for the big boys.  So since I have a big boy audience, I decided not to start another thread by asking my question here.  I'm asking the deacons to bare with me as I stray from the subject of this thread but inquire about an issue that has stemed from previous statements here.

BBD you have stated that you have a family.  I know that a few of us do.  To this day, I still havnt brought myself to the point where I can leave my daughter to hustle on the road as a musician.  I have responsibilities that I must maintain for me and my child such as health insurance, dental insurance, retirement, child support, parent and teacher conferences and so on.  For those of you on the road with families, how do you balance.  This is a little personal but I actually lost my marriage to the game and it was on a local level.  I can't imagine how much faster I wouldve lost it if I was on a national level. 

I mean I went to a drum clinic to see steve ferone, steve smith, don f., and mike manginni, and these guys were talking about how they have lost their families as well to their craft.  I look on myspace and I see spanky missing his daughter's birthday and I'm sympathising like man our daughters are around the same age.  I don't know how I would deal with that.  I know calvin has a son, flat and beatboxer have kids.

If there is anyone out there who wouldn't mind sharing how to balance, (if there's such a thing) please do.  I'm sure everyone has different ways of handling business.  I'm just trying to see what's really good since no one really ever talks about it.



Respectfully,
Sheen

Im fortunate to have a wife thats in the music industry as well, so it kind of (noticed I said kind of) works out for my good. There is an understanding of what it takes to be in the music scene. Alot of times I get my gigs just because of her, so its like someone finds out she can sang......and I mean sang!!!! and at the same time find out that I can play, and alot of times we are traveling together on the same gigs. At the same time sometimes we arent, and we have 4 kids!!!! The key is to me is making your wife appreciate you, helping out as much as you can while your home, and doing as much as yoyu can while away. While your home watch the kids let her go out as much as she wants, at the same time pay someone to watch the kids or send to grandmas so yall can spend time together. I had to pay someone (A family member) to watch our kids for two days.....2 days!!! But it was all worth it, we spent the much needed time together that we needed. In the end she appreciate everything you try to do for her, and if shes real she will see the sacrifice. If your away, when you call make sure everything is okay. If there are any arrangements you can make while youre gone, make em. If you can afford to fly her in sometimes, then do it. Point is do all that you can do, even if it puts a burden on you, youre putting a burden on her right??? Let her know you appreciate her!!! Keep the fire burning in the relationship. God wants you to first take care of your home, that is in his word!!! Everything else he will then handle. He will create doors to open that will be an accessability to your career. Anyways to sum it up, do all that you can to accomodate her. If you can't it just may not be time for you to travel!!!!!

Offline Tuga

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Re: Studio Recording ?'s
« Reply #82 on: June 14, 2008, 09:20:27 AM »
Now this is real talk and its just in time for Fathers Day. Lets get into some grown folk talking. What an excellent and very important question.   All of those things in bold are very important.  Teachers and Parents conferences are very important especially for Fathers. Seeing Mommy show up is one thing, but when the Staff and Principles know who Daddy is because he can show up just as easy as Mom can and sometimes unannounced, now thats Huge.

Imma be chillin somewhere over here awaiting the wisdom------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------>   

By the way Happy Fathers Day to all the Fathers reading this! 

D.O.D. excellent execution!  Definetly worthy of a grammy nomination for Best LGM Thread High Jack.



Best thread I've seen in a long time!

This is tough because everybody's situation is different but let me tell you, if it wasn't for my wife, there is NO WAY I would be on the road.  She's my rock!!!  I basically got married in May 02' then joined the band and hit the road in June 02' so thats all we know.  We also have a strong supporting cast too.(grandmas and grandpas)  I think it would be a lot harder on her if they wasn't around. 

I got 2 kids, 8 year old boy and 2 year old daughter.  I think the hardest thing for me is my boy lives with his mom,(doesn't live with my wife and me) so I'm missing a lot there already.  Me and her (baby momma) have gone to parent teacher stuff way after the real conferences are over or sometimes we gotta tag team discipline on the phone.  Its tough.  Communication is the key!(praying, disciplining, encouraging, etc...)   My son actually tours with me over the summer except for fly dates. 

I think the family at home just needs to know that you care and that you're there!!!(even if you're hundreds of miles away)  I know wife don't wanna be hearing about how bad the monitor guy is! LOL

As for the health insurances, dental, etc......the family is under my wife's coverage.
By the way....... if any of you do tour or gigs for a living let me tell you....... GET SOME INSURANCE!!!
Our gtr player torn his ACL during a show a couple of years ago and didn't have insurance.  His doctors bill was 25K!!!  The bad thing is we was telling for years to go get some coverage.  He learned the hard way!

Offline baldeagle

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Re: Studio Recording ?'s
« Reply #83 on: June 14, 2008, 01:25:33 PM »
First giving honor to God and the pastor of this house, 4hisglory.  The deacons of this room, Juse and Sabe.  And to all the drumming saints who are blessed with eyes to read this thread.  ***I would insert a grin smiley but I'm on my PDA and I don't have that option lol*** 

This is indeed a grown man thread.  Strictly for the big boys.  So since I have a big boy audience, I decided not to start another thread by asking my question here.  I'm asking the deacons to bare with me as I stray from the subject of this thread but inquire about an issue that has stemed from previous statements here.

BBD you have stated that you have a family.  I know that a few of us do.  To this day, I still havnt brought myself to the point where I can leave my daughter to hustle on the road as a musician.  I have responsibilities that I must maintain for me and my child such as health insurance, dental insurance, retirement, child support, parent and teacher conferences and so on.  For those of you on the road with families, how do you balance.  This is a little personal but I actually lost my marriage to the game and it was on a local level.  I can't imagine how much faster I wouldve lost it if I was on a national level. 

I mean I went to a drum clinic to see steve ferone, steve smith, don f., and mike manginni, and these guys were talking about how they have lost their families as well to their craft.  I look on myspace and I see spanky missing his daughter's birthday and I'm sympathising like man our daughters are around the same age.  I don't know how I would deal with that.  I know calvin has a son, flat and beatboxer have kids.

If there is anyone out there who wouldn't mind sharing how to balance, (if there's such a thing) please do.  I'm sure everyone has different ways of handling business.  I'm just trying to see what's really good since no one really ever talks about it.



Respectfully,
Sheen

If you lost your marriage (serious) to the game (fun) your priorities weren't right in the first place. Check Genesis. . . before there was church, there was marriage. Before there was music, there was marriage. Before there were kids, there was marriage (a lot of us don't like hearing that, but that's what GOD did). God has a specific reason for doing things the way He does. If marriage was the first institution in the Bible, then obviously He expects us to make it first in our lives. In the New Testament, the Bible tells husbands to love their wives even as Christ loved the church, AND GAVE HIMSELF FOR IT!!! Jesus was in Heaven with God living fine, but because He loved us, He gave up what He really would like to doing, so He could take a less-enjoyable job and physically be with us and provide for us.

Nowadays, nobody cares about the specifics of the Bible, especially if it goes against what we WANT to do anyway. So I already know someone is going to refute this (even if not on the forum). But the Bible is what it is... THE standard. If your marriage will suffer, get rid of something else... not the marriage.

Be blessed. And obedient.
It's God's way. . . or Hell to pay

Offline diligent-hands

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Re: Studio Recording ?'s
« Reply #84 on: June 14, 2008, 02:03:10 PM »
If you lost your marriage (serious) to the game (fun) your priorities weren't right in the first place. Check Genesis. . . before there was church, there was marriage. Before there was music, there was marriage. Before there were kids, there was marriage (a lot of us don't like hearing that, but that's what GOD did). God has a specific reason for doing things the way He does. If marriage was the first institution in the Bible, then obviously He expects us to make it first in our lives. In the New Testament, the Bible tells husbands to love their wives even as Christ loved the church, AND GAVE HIMSELF FOR IT!!! Jesus was in Heaven with God living fine, but because He loved us, He gave up what He really would like to doing, so He could take a less-enjoyable job and physically be with us and provide for us.Nowadays, nobody cares about the specifics of the Bible, especially if it goes against what we WANT to do anyway. So I already know someone is going to refute this (even if not on the forum). But the Bible is what it is... THE standard. If your marriage will suffer, get rid of something else... not the marriage.Be blessed. And obedient.
MESSAGE!!!!!!!!!!!.. that boy preaching now

D.H.

Offline dude-on-drums

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Re: Studio Recording ?'s
« Reply #85 on: June 14, 2008, 02:27:12 PM »
First off I want to thank those of you who shared their stories prior to Bald Eagle's response.  There is some good food here.  Eat up.


Now to address bald eagle's statement.  Do you really think I lost my marriage because I couldn't stay away from sheds till 2:00 in the morning?  When I said "game" I didn't mean "fun."  I meant the hustle of a musician trying to earn money, put food on the table for the family and at the same time fulfill your personal desires and dreams.  I'm glad to see that MOST of you understood that.


I said this topic is for the big boys.  I know I said it cause I was right here when I typed it lol.  I know I said "big boys" cause you quoted me.  So be a big boy and stay with us.  This conversation is not going in the direction you're trying to take it.  There is no need for anyone to be commercial right now.  No need to read out of context like a hustling preacher with all the answers to questions nobody's asking...


Now, let's get back to this wonderful Father's Day meal.

Offline diligent-hands

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Re: Studio Recording ?'s
« Reply #86 on: June 14, 2008, 02:33:13 PM »
SHEEN is crazy..lol.. someone pass the potato salad and cornbread please....


D.H.

Offline cdrums116

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Re: Studio Recording ?'s
« Reply #87 on: June 14, 2008, 02:59:14 PM »
First giving honor to God and the pastor of this house, 4hisglory.  The deacons of this room, Juse and Sabe.  And to all the drumming saints who are blessed with eyes to read this thread.  ***I would insert a grin smiley but I'm on my PDA and I don't have that option lol*** 

This is indeed a grown man thread.  Strictly for the big boys.  So since I have a big boy audience, I decided not to start another thread by asking my question here.  I'm asking the deacons to bare with me as I stray from the subject of this thread but inquire about an issue that has stemed from previous statements here.

BBD you have stated that you have a family.  I know that a few of us do.  To this day, I still havnt brought myself to the point where I can leave my daughter to hustle on the road as a musician.  I have responsibilities that I must maintain for me and my child such as health insurance, dental insurance, retirement, child support, parent and teacher conferences and so on.  For those of you on the road with families, how do you balance.  This is a little personal but I actually lost my marriage to the game and it was on a local level.  I can't imagine how much faster I wouldve lost it if I was on a national level. 

I mean I went to a drum clinic to see steve ferone, steve smith, don f., and mike manginni, and these guys were talking about how they have lost their families as well to their craft.  I look on myspace and I see spanky missing his daughter's birthday and I'm sympathising like man our daughters are around the same age.  I don't know how I would deal with that.  I know calvin has a son, flat and beatboxer have kids.

If there is anyone out there who wouldn't mind sharing how to balance, (if there's such a thing) please do.  I'm sure everyone has different ways of handling business.  I'm just trying to see what's really good since no one really ever talks about it.



Respectfully,
Sheen

Real talk dude, cuz this is a real issue. I have two children man, a boy and a girl. My son is like my shadow bruh. He's a drummer, and a straight up daddy's boy, just like I was. My daughter completely changed my life and way of thinking too. I don't see my children nearly as much as I'd like to. I don't make every school event, like I'd like to. Sometimes I don't even get to talk to them, like I want to. Man, this is a life I prayed and asked GOD for. And in this walk, I've made some critical mistakes(not saying my children are mistakes at all). It's hard to do this, when you don't have a supportive/understanding spouse. It's like, if I stay home I don't meet my quota. If I leave, I miss picking the kids up. I've had to alter my life drastically at times, to be THERE. And it aint inexpensive either. But God has called me to this, so I have to find a way to make it work. I state in my clinics all the time that being called to minister to the masses can cost you everything. Sometimes(most times), we make the wrong decisions. Always thinking...."I'll catch it next time". I'll be the first to say that I'm guilty of this. But it is my daily prayer that God would enlarge my territory, so that I don't have to make these kind of decisions. I want the big records, the big songs....not so that I can make my name great. But so that I can better provide(financially, physically and emotionally) for my family. I tell guys all the time that we have to understand that THIS life isn't for everyone. Some of our families can't handle us being gone for months at a time. I think a lot of times we feel like if we're good enough, we should be out on the road. But if we're ALL out on the road, WHO'S GONNA BE AT CHURCH ON SUNDAY? I could go on and on about this matter. Here's a challenge....
Start praying for your brothers in Christ, who are doing this. It aint easy at all!!!
Luv yall much....HOLLA

C-Rod
C. Rodgers
It's All For The Love Yall.....

Offline BEATBOXERZ

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Re: Studio Recording ?'s
« Reply #88 on: June 14, 2008, 04:19:05 PM »
Yes indeed this here is for grown men only! I was done with trying to be that superstar drummer/musician when I had my second son in 96'.  It wasn't in my deck of cards to be away from my children, on the road trying to forefill my so-called childhood dream. My role was to be a husband and father. Not touring on the road for long stays anyway from my family.
I've been with my wife for 14yrs, and married for over 10 1/2 years. I have three beautiful children, 2boys, my oldest is 17, my youngest boy is 12. I have a daughter, and she is 10. There is no time for me to be away from home trying to be a full-time touring drummer. Like Kevin said, medical insurance is a must! Unless you can afford to pay a $25,000 bill with the gigs you have, then you better get some for your family.
My 17 yr old is a busy kid. He's a talented student-althele and participate in many AAU events all over the West Coast. My litttle boy is just busy being a kid. He likes to swim, play football and Tae-Kwon-Do. My daughter is a dancer/cheerleader and she goes on long trips.
All that takes lots of time, money and insurance.
For you drummers who are able to travel to all parts of the globe and maintain a fatherly relationship with your children, God Bless you. I chose to put others before myself, because there is no balance when you're not at home naturing your seeds.

Great post Kevin, much respect lil bro. I'm quite sure that you would have been on the cover of Modern Drummer if you would have been selfish and allowed your passion for music to dictate your relationship with your daughter.

Trust that it will all comeback to you God's way!!!

Offline bigblackdrummer

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Re: Studio Recording ?'s
« Reply #89 on: June 14, 2008, 04:39:02 PM »
Ill be honest with you guys... God has called us to be ministers to our families first!!! I disagree with people who believe "being called to minister to the masses can cost you everything"! Im not trying to nail on Calvin, Ive heard many people say the same thing. Look at the usual out come of that sort or thinking: Divorce, Unhappiness, Neglect, Emotional Break Down, Teenage girls looking for a Dad by having sex with men, Cheating, drug abuse and so on and so on!!! DID God call up to live like that? NO! And its even worse when they use Jesus name to back it up.

LOOK at all the messed up children of ministers, musicians, actors, why? Neglect! No matter where I am (I do short tours or have to be away weekends) I call everyday to talk to my wife and kids, if Grandma has to keep them overnight I call Grandma too. Once we have children that our ministry, they are way more then a mouth to feed and backs to clothe

It is harder to be married and be a touring musician!!! At the end of the day your Spouse is not a slave (especially if they hold down jobs). Why should they always be watching children, cleaning the house, cooking and living life as a single parent! THAT JUST OPENS THE DOOR TO SOME REAL EXTREEM MARITAL ISSUES LIKE CHEATING.

There has to be balance! That's why I do production and sometimes have practices at my home. Go on date nights, take the kids with me when I head out to the store and stuff and work a day job.
I started treating my wife like a slave and I almost lost everything!!!!
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Offline dude-on-drums

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Re: Studio Recording ?'s
« Reply #90 on: June 14, 2008, 05:25:12 PM »
Real talk dude, cuz this is a real issue. I have two children man, a boy and a girl. My son is like my shadow bruh. He's a drummer, and a straight up daddy's boy, just like I was. My daughter completely changed my life and way of thinking too. I don't see my children nearly as much as I'd like to. I don't make every school event, like I'd like to. Sometimes I don't even get to talk to them, like I want to. Man, this is a life I prayed and asked GOD for. And in this walk, I've made some critical mistakes(not saying my children are mistakes at all). It's hard to do this, when you don't have a supportive/understanding spouse. It's like, if I stay home I don't meet my quota. If I leave, I miss picking the kids up. I've had to alter my life drastically at times, to be THERE. And it aint inexpensive either. But God has called me to this, so I have to find a way to make it work. I state in my clinics all the time that being called to minister to the masses can cost you everything. Sometimes(most times), we make the wrong decisions. Always thinking...."I'll catch it next time". I'll be the first to say that I'm guilty of this. But it is my daily prayer that God would enlarge my territory, so that I don't have to make these kind of decisions. I want the big records, the big songs....not so that I can make my name great. But so that I can better provide(financially, physically and emotionally) for my family. I tell guys all the time that we have to understand that THIS life isn't for everyone. Some of our families can't handle us being gone for months at a time. I think a lot of times we feel like if we're good enough, we should be out on the road. But if we're ALL out on the road, WHO'S GONNA BE AT CHURCH ON SUNDAY? I could go on and on about this matter. Here's a challenge....
Start praying for your brothers in Christ, who are doing this. It aint easy at all!!!
Luv yall much....HOLLA

C-Rod


Man I'm glad you put that out there cause I never saw it that way before.  You most definately have my prayers bro and a whole new respect for what youre about, on and off the drum throne.  God bless.


Yes indeed this here is for grown men only! I was done with trying to be that superstar drummer/musician when I had my second son in 96'.  It wasn't in my deck of cards to be away from my children, on the road trying to forefill my so-called childhood dream. My role was to be a husband and father. Not touring on the road for long stays anyway from my family.

I've been with my wife for 14yrs, and married for over 10 1/2 years. I have three beautiful children, 2boys, my oldest is 17, my youngest boy is 12. I have a daughter, and she is 10. There is no time for me to be away from home trying to be a full-time touring drummer. Like Kevin said, medical insurance is a must! Unless you can afford to pay a $25,000 bill with the gigs you have, then you better get some for your family. My 17 yr old is a busy kid. He's a talented student-althele and participate in many AAU events all over the West Coast. My litttle boy is just busy being a kid. He likes to swim, play football and Tae-Kwon-Do. My daughter is a dancer/cheerleader and she goes on long trips.
All that takes lots of time, money and insurance.

For you drummers who are able to travel to all parts of the globe and maintain a fatherly relationship with your children, God Bless you. I chose to put others before myself, because there is no balance when you're not at home naturing your seeds.

Great post Kevin, must respect lil bro. I'm quite sure that you would have been on the cover of Modern Drummer if you would have been selfish and allowed your passion for music to dictate your relationship with your daughter.

Trust that it will all comeback to you God's way!!!


Brick layer  ;)


Ill be honest with you guys... God has called us to be ministers to our families first!!! I disagree with people who believe "being called to minister to the masses can cost you everything"! Im not trying to nail on Calvin, Ive heard many people say the same thing. Look at the usual out come of that sort or thinking: Divorce, Unhappiness, Neglect, Emotional Break Down, Teenage girls looking for a Dad by having sex with men, Cheating, drug abuse and so on and so on!!! DID God call up to live like that? NO! And its even worse when they use Jesus name to back it up.

LOOK at all the messed up children of ministers, musicians, actors, why? Neglect! No matter where I am (I do short tours or have to be away weekends) I call everyday to talk to my wife and kids, if Grandma has to keep them overnight I call Grandma too. Once we have children that our ministry, they are way more then a mouth to feed and backs to clothe

It is harder to be married and be a touring musician!!! At the end of the day your Spouse is not a slave (especially if they hold down jobs). Why should they always be watching children, cleaning the house, cooking and living life as a single parent! THAT JUST OPENS THE DOOR TO SOME REAL EXTREEM MARITAL ISSUES LIKE CHEATING.

There has to be balance! That's why I do production and sometimes have practices at my home. Go on date nights, take the kids with me when I head out to the store and stuff and work a day job.I started treating my wife like a slave and I almost lost everything!!!!


Again.  Interesting points.


I'll say it again.  Everyone has different methods of taking care of business.  And it seems as though one's method would depend on what one's priorities are, versus what they should be, (which is a matter of strict opinion.)  We gotta do what works best for us and our families.  Balance is key.  Tuga mentioned his wife being his "rock."  Support is also key. 

I dont know about yall but I must take a small intermission to donate more money to this site.  Im learning alot.   :)

Offline Natejam71

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Re: Studio Recording ?'s
« Reply #91 on: June 14, 2008, 05:42:41 PM »
SHEEN is crazy..lol.. someone pass the potato salad and cornbread please....


D.H.

I got those wings and I got you on the potato salad and cornbread......Stay Blessed, Nate J.

Offline cdrums116

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Re: Studio Recording ?'s
« Reply #92 on: June 14, 2008, 06:05:49 PM »
Ill be honest with you guys... God has called us to be ministers to our families first!!! I disagree with people who believe "being called to minister to the masses can cost you everything"! Im not trying to nail on Calvin, Ive heard many people say the same thing. Look at the usual out come of that sort or thinking: Divorce, Unhappiness, Neglect, Emotional Break Down, Teenage girls looking for a Dad by having sex with men, Cheating, drug abuse and so on and so on!!! DID God call up to live like that? NO! And its even worse when they use Jesus name to back it up.

LOOK at all the messed up children of ministers, musicians, actors, why? Neglect! No matter where I am (I do short tours or have to be away weekends) I call everyday to talk to my wife and kids, if Grandma has to keep them overnight I call Grandma too. Once we have children that our ministry, they are way more then a mouth to feed and backs to clothe

It is harder to be married and be a touring musician!!! At the end of the day your Spouse is not a slave (especially if they hold down jobs). Why should they always be watching children, cleaning the house, cooking and living life as a single parent! THAT JUST OPENS THE DOOR TO SOME REAL EXTREEM MARITAL ISSUES LIKE CHEATING.

There has to be balance! That's why I do production and sometimes have practices at my home. Go on date nights, take the kids with me when I head out to the store and stuff and work a day job.
I started treating my wife like a slave and I almost lost everything!!!!

How can you disagree with people who believe ministering to the masses can cost you everything? Note: I didn't say it WILL cost you everything. I said IT CAN, and that is the truth BBD. You can have a 9-5 and still miss some of the things going on. The world we live in today is different. The world/economy demands more of you, no matter WHAT your profession is. Divorce isn't a ministry issue. It's a world issue. People who are home all week long still can't keep their marriages together. Anytime you have a career(not a job), it's going to demand your time. As I said before, we all make mistakes when it comes to making the right decisions regarding time. Who on here doesn't? Whether it's saving money, getting your oil changed, seeing your son play basketball on saturday....we've all said it before. "I'll catch it next time". Is that right? ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!! But it happens man.
C. Rodgers
It's All For The Love Yall.....

Offline fLaT-fIfTh

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Re: Studio Recording ?'s
« Reply #93 on: June 14, 2008, 06:39:43 PM »
First giving honor to God and the pastor of this house, 4hisglory.  The deacons of this room, Juse and Sabe.  And to all the drumming saints who are blessed with eyes to read this thread.  ***I would insert a grin smiley but I'm on my PDA and I don't have that option lol*** 

This is indeed a grown man thread.  Strictly for the big boys.  So since I have a big boy audience, I decided not to start another thread by asking my question here.  I'm asking the deacons to bare with me as I stray from the subject of this thread but inquire about an issue that has stemed from previous statements here.

BBD you have stated that you have a family.  I know that a few of us do.  To this day, I still havnt brought myself to the point where I can leave my daughter to hustle on the road as a musician.  I have responsibilities that I must maintain for me and my child such as health insurance, dental insurance, retirement, child support, parent and teacher conferences and so on.  For those of you on the road with families, how do you balance.  This is a little personal but I actually lost my marriage to the game and it was on a local level.  I can't imagine how much faster I wouldve lost it if I was on a national level. 

I mean I went to a drum clinic to see steve ferone, steve smith, don f., and mike manginni, and these guys were talking about how they have lost their families as well to their craft.  I look on myspace and I see spanky missing his daughter's birthday and I'm sympathising like man our daughters are around the same age.  I don't know how I would deal with that.  I know calvin has a son, flat and beatboxer have kids.

If there is anyone out there who wouldn't mind sharing how to balance, (if there's such a thing) please do.  I'm sure everyone has different ways of handling business.  I'm just trying to see what's really good since no one really ever talks about it.



Respectfully,
Sheen

Man... It's great to see cats keep it real. Many of these points are common knowledge to cats in the "game." However, it is rarely discussed outside the inner circle. I hope some of you young gunners eat this brain food and learn from it.
Now, I'm saving some of my story for a book I've been contemplating, but I will share a few golden nuggets of my story in hopes that someone may learn from it...

I'm the son of a pastor. When I was a kid, my father would always try to get me to play instruments because he needed a loyal musician at the church. I would fumble with it from time to time... I learned to play drums and later learned a few chords and I was on my way. However, I never took music seriously because I was into guns, selling weed, girls, and Metallica ;D My dad would buy me instruments, but I never had anyone to sit behind or shed with. I started taking organ lessons at age 13 and was holding my own on keys at 15. Now I'm ready to get serious about my music and produced my first retail-ready single for my homies in high school. With the gift of gab, I talked my way into a distribution deal with a company called The Music People that distributed Master P at the time. I was a stupid kid. The distributor took me for a ride and I never seen a dime. Yet I was still determined to do music. BUT THEN... AT 15... MY GIRL GOT PREGNANT :-[ ?/? Long story short... Father at 16...married at 17... buried a child at 18. Still trying to hang on to music, I started a new label after high school and released two solo albums. Feeling like my musical aspirations were slipping away, I had my company logo tattooed on my shoulder thinking it would keep me close to music, but I felt it slipping away. I had responsibilities! I had a wife and a kid at 18 that expected me to feed and support them! Who, me? YEAH, ME! It's usually a choice of music or family. It's nearly impossible to do both effectively. I had to make a choice and I chose my family. It was a looooooong struggle for me because I was young and inexperienced. I had to grow up overnight and I learned as I went on...
When I was 19, I got a job at GC in the Keys department thinking I would be able to practice all day. WRONG!!!! They were like "Sell, sell, sell" and the commissions were extra wack! It also made me mad that I was working around all that gear and couldn't afford none of it. Needless to say, that gig didn't last too long...
I've had to hustle for my family from day 1. At one time, I worked 3 jobs; 2 during the week and 1 on the weekends. I used to call it my off day when I only had to go to one job! lol God has brought me a long way man.
When the Korg Trinity first came out, I bought it right away. Then I quickly sold it because my family was in need. When the Akai MPC 2000 first came out, I prepaid for mine and had it on day 1. Then quickly sold it because my family was in need. I Bought a custom bass. Then quickly sold it because my family was in need. When I was 21, I took a job with a major corporation making much less than I was getting from my two jobs at the time.

Notice I ain't talkin' too much about music right now? I had to make a choice...

After years of sacrifice and struggle and a detachment from music. God gave me a nice salary and placed it upon my heart to create something that would help cats in similar situations. The cats that don't have anyone to sit behind or learn from. Everybody is not fortunate to sit behind a Calvin Rodgers every Sunday and learn from him. It would be great if it were so. But what about the cats that don't have nobody? More than a decade later, God showed me how to bring that thing full circle and incorporate my family into my music. ;) I believe it is because of my faithfulness to God and dedication to my family that God is blessing me in such a way. My wife helps me run the office now. I took my son to NY to film SSV2 and he shot some background footage on the dvd.
Now I'm 33 with a 17 year old son (6 kids, one wife) and I can stand flat footed and declare that God has been more than good to me. Family first... No other options. When I was 15 and scared to be a father and wanted to run, the thing I kept thinking about was the fact that my father NEVER left me. Running was not an option.

So, now when I'm on the road, I tie the wife up in the basement until I get back. The kids, however,  are free to leave at any time because the won't practice!!! :D ;D j/k

God bless

Offline j_kay

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Re: Studio Recording ?'s
« Reply #94 on: June 14, 2008, 06:55:20 PM »
Good story, yo!
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Offline ikickset

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Re: Studio Recording ?'s
« Reply #95 on: June 14, 2008, 07:35:19 PM »
wow thats pretty deep..i guess its kids/family or music, no in between. so im glad i dont have kids yet! i do want sum one day tho.

Offline bigblackdrummer

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Re: Studio Recording ?'s
« Reply #96 on: June 14, 2008, 07:48:20 PM »
How can you disagree with people who believe ministering to the masses can cost you everything? Note: I didn't say it WILL cost you everything. I said IT CAN, and that is the truth BBD. You can have a 9-5 and still miss some of the things going on. The world we live in today is different. The world/economy demands more of you, no matter WHAT your profession is. Divorce isn't a ministry issue. It's a world issue. People who are home all week long still can't keep their marriages together. Anytime you have a career(not a job), it's going to demand your time. As I said before, we all make mistakes when it comes to making the right decisions regarding time. Who on here doesn't? Whether it's saving money, getting your oil changed, seeing your son play basketball on Saturday....we've all said it before. "I'll catch it next time". Is that right? ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!! But it happens man.

Calvin because ministering to the masses should not cost you everything!!! Maybe not you, but most ministers that Ive herd quote that out of their mouths are usually the ones who neglect their families, marriages and children. Ministry should not cost you your wife and kids!!!! How can you say you're ministering to others when you cant even minister to your own family!!!! Again when I say "you" I don't mean you as in "Calvin", that would be judgmental of me to accuse you.

Saving money, getting your oil changed is not even close to neglecting your family... How many times can one say "I'll catch it next time" before they cant!!!!
 
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Offline teflonminds88

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Re: Studio Recording ?'s
« Reply #97 on: June 14, 2008, 08:32:10 PM »
Man yall seriously put things in perspective for me as far as my drumming goes. I can honestly say that Ive not yet experienced a situation where my career and family hung in the balance. I COULDNT BEGIN TO IMAGINE WHAT THAT FEELS LIKE :-\

I appreciate all the stories that were shared. Maybe when its time for me to make decisions of such great magnitude, I'll be able to apply what I read to my own situation :)


Oh BTW Flat, I'm definitely coppin that book WHEN it releases (in Jesus name)

"Give them the truth, so they approach the situation with ammunition."

Offline ikickset

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Re: Studio Recording ?'s
« Reply #98 on: June 14, 2008, 08:33:12 PM »
i was thinking...i do know of plenty of other jobs they take u away from family for long periods of time. i guess every individual sitiaution is different....so u gotta do what works best 4 you and your family. it can work!

Offline bigblackdrummer

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Re: Studio Recording ?'s
« Reply #99 on: June 14, 2008, 08:40:49 PM »
i was thinking...i do know of plenty of other jobs they take u away from family for long periods of time. i guess every individual situation is different....so u gotta do what works best 4 you and your family. it can work!

As long as your decision keeps your family and children first and happy.
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