First giving honor to God and the pastor of this house, 4hisglory. The deacons of this room, Juse and Sabe. And to all the drumming saints who are blessed with eyes to read this thread. ***I would insert a grin smiley but I'm on my PDA and I don't have that option lol***
This is indeed a grown man thread. Strictly for the big boys. So since I have a big boy audience, I decided not to start another thread by asking my question here. I'm asking the deacons to bare with me as I stray from the subject of this thread but inquire about an issue that has stemed from previous statements here.
BBD you have stated that you have a family. I know that a few of us do. To this day, I still havnt brought myself to the point where I can leave my daughter to hustle on the road as a musician. I have responsibilities that I must maintain for me and my child such as health insurance, dental insurance, retirement, child support, parent and teacher conferences and so on. For those of you on the road with families, how do you balance. This is a little personal but I actually lost my marriage to the game and it was on a local level. I can't imagine how much faster I wouldve lost it if I was on a national level.
I mean I went to a drum clinic to see steve ferone, steve smith, don f., and mike manginni, and these guys were talking about how they have lost their families as well to their craft. I look on myspace and I see spanky missing his daughter's birthday and I'm sympathising like man our daughters are around the same age. I don't know how I would deal with that. I know calvin has a son, flat and beatboxer have kids.
If there is anyone out there who wouldn't mind sharing how to balance, (if there's such a thing) please do. I'm sure everyone has different ways of handling business. I'm just trying to see what's really good since no one really ever talks about it.
Respectfully,
Sheen
Man... It's great to see cats keep it real. Many of these points are common knowledge to cats in the "game." However, it is rarely discussed outside the inner circle. I hope some of you young gunners eat this brain food and learn from it.
Now, I'm saving some of my story for a book I've been contemplating, but I will share a few golden nuggets of my story in hopes that someone may learn from it...
I'm the son of a pastor. When I was a kid, my father would always try to get me to play instruments because he needed a loyal musician at the church. I would fumble with it from time to time... I learned to play drums and later learned a few chords and I was on my way. However, I never took music seriously because I was into guns, selling weed, girls, and Metallica
My dad would buy me instruments, but I never had anyone to sit behind or shed with. I started taking organ lessons at age 13 and was holding my own on keys at 15. Now I'm ready to get serious about my music and produced my first retail-ready single for my homies in high school. With the gift of gab, I talked my way into a distribution deal with a company called The Music People that distributed Master P at the time. I was a stupid kid. The distributor took me for a ride and I never seen a dime. Yet I was still determined to do music. BUT THEN... AT 15... MY GIRL GOT PREGNANT
Long story short... Father at 16...married at 17... buried a child at 18. Still trying to hang on to music, I started a new label after high school and released two solo albums. Feeling like my musical aspirations were slipping away, I had my company logo tattooed on my shoulder thinking it would keep me close to music, but I felt it slipping away. I had responsibilities! I had a wife and a kid at 18 that expected me to feed and support them! Who, me? YEAH, ME! It's usually a choice of music
or family. It's nearly impossible to do both effectively. I had to make a choice and I chose my family. It was a looooooong struggle for me because I was young and inexperienced. I had to grow up overnight and I learned as I went on...
When I was 19, I got a job at GC in the Keys department thinking I would be able to practice all day. WRONG!!!! They were like "Sell, sell, sell" and the commissions were extra wack! It also made me mad that I was working around all that gear and couldn't afford none of it. Needless to say, that gig didn't last too long...
I've had to hustle for my family from day 1. At one time, I worked 3 jobs; 2 during the week and 1 on the weekends. I used to call it my off day when I only had to go to one job! lol God has brought me a long way man.
When the Korg Trinity first came out, I bought it right away. Then I quickly sold it because my family was in need. When the Akai MPC 2000 first came out, I prepaid for mine and had it on day 1. Then quickly sold it because my family was in need. I Bought a custom bass. Then quickly sold it because my family was in need. When I was 21, I took a job with a major corporation making much less than I was getting from my two jobs at the time.
Notice I ain't talkin' too much about music right now? I had to make a choice...
After years of sacrifice and struggle and a detachment from music. God gave me a nice salary and placed it upon my heart to create something that would help cats in similar situations. The cats that don't have anyone to sit behind or learn from. Everybody is not fortunate to sit behind a Calvin Rodgers every Sunday and learn from him. It would be great if it were so. But what about the cats that don't have nobody? More than a decade later, God showed me how to bring that thing full circle and incorporate my family into my music.
I believe it is because of my faithfulness to God and dedication to my family that God is blessing me in such a way. My wife helps me run the office now. I took my son to NY to film SSV2 and he shot some background footage on the dvd.
Now I'm 33 with a 17 year old son (6 kids, one wife) and I can stand flat footed and declare that God has been more than good to me. Family first... No other options. When I was 15 and scared to be a father and wanted to run, the thing I kept thinking about was the fact that my father NEVER left me. Running was not an option.
So, now when I'm on the road, I tie the wife up in the basement until I get back. The kids, however, are free to leave at any time because the won't practice!!!
j/k
God bless