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Author Topic: RELATIONSHIP MANAGEMENT IN THE CHIOR  (Read 3008 times)

Offline xela

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RELATIONSHIP MANAGEMENT IN THE CHIOR
« on: June 02, 2011, 01:06:01 PM »
Relationship management in the choir

The church choir is indeed a community of several individuals both males and females, except in some few that are composed of just the same sex.
The effect of the relationship index of the choir members in respect to each other and involving others outside is of a great consequence to the effectiveness and efficiency of the choir.
Open and a free opportunities for choir members to get along with themselves has created its own share of problems, this is so because many choir members have not be taught on handling relationship issues. Many choirs have experienced setbacks in their development and effectiveness because they found themselves in situations where almost everyone is in a form of relationship with the other person in the choir. A relationship always comes with its own issues.
In as much as love and unity is encouraged for the effective delivery of a choir, the need for restrictions and constraints in the way relationship are carried out must be addressed with all seriousness.
There was a particular situation in which a female choir director was in a relationship with a male choir member. Along the way the relationship did not work, she now started behaving very hostile to the male she was involved with in the presence of everybody. No one in the choir knew they ever had a relationship together.
I strongly believe that the church choir must have and maintain a deep level of spirituality and sanctity, in the mist of the joy and harmony that is expected from them.
It really does the choir no good neither the church, when it is reported that acts of sexual immorality   is found among members of the choir. It discredits every ministration they will eventually carry out.
Relation issues in the choir must be regulated by the church’s leadership not by selecting partners for the choir members but by making sure things are done orderly and in accordance to God’s command.


Offline under13

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Re: RELATIONSHIP MANAGEMENT IN THE CHIOR
« Reply #1 on: June 02, 2011, 01:49:11 PM »
Interesting. I remember somebody telling me that they were not even allowed to speak to people of the opposite sex who were members of their traveling choir. :-\

Offline phbrown

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Re: RELATIONSHIP MANAGEMENT IN THE CHIOR
« Reply #2 on: June 02, 2011, 02:08:06 PM »
strict regulation is only for those who don't know how to behave themselves

however strict regulation only hurt those who do know how to behave themselves

thus the very rules we create fix one problem but create another problem

Offline baggettcindy

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Re: RELATIONSHIP MANAGEMENT IN THE CHIOR
« Reply #3 on: June 02, 2011, 03:05:13 PM »
"strict regulation is only for those who don't know how to behave themselves

however strict regulation only hurt those who do know how to behave themselves

thus the very rules we create fix one problem but create another problem"

I agree with this....Note: I also see Xela's POV

Offline phbrown

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Re: RELATIONSHIP MANAGEMENT IN THE CHIOR
« Reply #4 on: June 02, 2011, 03:08:25 PM »
Note: I also see Xela's POV

+1, it is a tricky situation ....


ohhh I got it

Require all members to be married :D

Offline BassbyGrace

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Re: RELATIONSHIP MANAGEMENT IN THE CHIOR
« Reply #5 on: June 02, 2011, 03:11:34 PM »
Interesting.  What if they already have a relationship before joining?  Are you going to tell one they can't be in the choir or they have to breakup?
Praise Him!

Offline baggettcindy

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Re: RELATIONSHIP MANAGEMENT IN THE CHIOR
« Reply #6 on: June 02, 2011, 03:26:29 PM »
+1, it is a tricky situation ....


ohhh I got it

Require all members to be married :D


Marriage...er'body???  I think that would make things a lot worse.

Offline phbrown

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Re: RELATIONSHIP MANAGEMENT IN THE CHIOR
« Reply #7 on: June 02, 2011, 03:30:15 PM »
Marriage...er'body???  I think that would make things a lot worse.

lol, your right I was just being silly

Offline phbrown

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Re: RELATIONSHIP MANAGEMENT IN THE CHIOR
« Reply #8 on: June 02, 2011, 03:31:03 PM »
Interesting.  What if they already have a relationship before joining?  Are you going to tell one they can't be in the choir or they have to breakup?

yep! Just kidding I'm just being silly


oh wait are you talking to phbrown or to xela?

Offline BassbyGrace

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Re: RELATIONSHIP MANAGEMENT IN THE CHIOR
« Reply #9 on: June 02, 2011, 03:41:24 PM »
for the original topic.  I mean, I can understand the rule, but what about ppl already together, or the scenario I previously stated?
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Offline LaylaMonroe

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Re: RELATIONSHIP MANAGEMENT IN THE CHIOR
« Reply #10 on: June 02, 2011, 08:32:33 PM »
And how can you determine whether they're in a Godly relationship or not? I mean, aside from the obvious like unwed pregnancy or some sort of nasty argument or violence in public, how can you tell that their relationship is or isn't a holy one?
When you're in love you don't want to fall asleep bc reality is finally better than your dreams.

Offline vtguy84

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Re: RELATIONSHIP MANAGEMENT IN THE CHIOR
« Reply #11 on: June 03, 2011, 03:10:43 PM »
I don't think the church leadership can be in any position to tell their members who to date and who not to date. 
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Offline LaylaMonroe

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Re: RELATIONSHIP MANAGEMENT IN THE CHIOR
« Reply #12 on: June 03, 2011, 03:30:24 PM »
I don't think the church leadership can be in any position to tell their members who to date and who not to date. 

Agreed.
When you're in love you don't want to fall asleep bc reality is finally better than your dreams.

Offline malthumb

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Re: RELATIONSHIP MANAGEMENT IN THE CHIOR
« Reply #13 on: June 03, 2011, 07:27:49 PM »
The only thing the church has any dominion over is the professionalism of the choir director. They could make a condition of the position that there be no romantic involvement with choir members and/or musicians.  Issue being removing potential for abuse of power.

This is consistent with the way efficient businesses run.  Still doesn't deal with how choir members interact with each other.

Let's face it, you can't legislate common sense.

FAITH unites people
RELIGION divides FAITH
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